The Top Ten Most Disappointing Edibles and Potables of Children’s Literature
The votes are in. I asked Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter for the foods they were most disappointed by after reading about them in books as kids.
People had opinions. Many. Many. Opinions. Apparently once you’ve been burned by an author’s literary seduction when it comes to describing, say, fried apple/onion sandwiches, you don’t forgive easily.
After culling through the shockingly abundant opinions (they’re still coming in but I had to draw the line somewhere) I present to you the official Top 10 of most misleading foodstuffs and libations of the children’s book world, where ten is the best and one is the worst. With room for Honorable Mentions as well:
#10 – Raspberry Cordial
Susan S. Yoon – “Raspberry Cordial from Anne of Green Gables! It sounded so fancy but alas it was just raspberry juice.”
#9 – Honey
Jordan J. Scavone – “Honey from Pooh Bear, I mean I like Honey, but it’s nothing like in the book/show.”
Anon – “Does honey (and honeycomb) count even though I’d had it already? The combination of Winnie the Pooh and Berenstain Bears made it seem like the height of flavor. I kept retrying it thinking it would finally taste as good as it looked in those picture books.”
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
#8 – Marmalade
Destinee Sutton – “My daughter was excited to try orange marmalade after reading/watching Paddington, but she really didn’t like it. Pieces of the peel! Gross! She prefers strawberry jam a la Frances.”
Jen de Oliveira – “Paddington made marmalade sandwiches sound delightful … I thought it would taste like honey, but no! Sometimes I find myself wanting to buy a jar of marmalade again and I have to remind myself about those bitter chunks of orange peel in it.”
#7 – Liverwurst Sandwiches
Betty G. Yee – “In A Wrinkle in Time, Meg Murry famously fixed herself a cream cheese and liverwurst sandwich. To this day i have no idea what it might taste like but when i asked for it at a deli restaurant the waiter turned a bit green and steered me to something else.”
Jennifer Ochoa – “Many Judy Blume mentions of liverwurst on rye with mustard….NOT DELICIOUS!!!”
Barney Saltzberg – “Great question. After reading Cricket in Times Square I had to try liverwurst. First and last time.”
#6 – Chocolate Babies
Deborah Lakritz – “Chocolate babies and ginger snap crackers from All of a Kind Family.”
Marjorie Ingall – “The amazing descriptions of food in All of a Kind family are mostly LIES. Hot chickpeas are not delicious just because they’re served in a friggin paper cone! (And I had chocolate babies once — mediocre gummy chocolate.)”
#5 – Dairy Products ala Heidi
Beth Carpenter-McGuire – “I was certain that milk straight from the cow would be as wonderful as Heidi described, but that’s a big nope for me.”
Tameka Fryer Brown – “When I read Heidi and they made that cheese from goat’s milk, it sounded like it would be the best cheese on the planet.
Like…it’s good but….”
#4 – Tomato Sandwiches
Diana Peterfreund: “Harriet’s tomato sandwiches, which I thought were gross AF as a child, then a few years ago I learned how southerners made them (no idea how Harriet got the recipe, TBH) and found them delightful.”
Rebecca Van Slyke – “Of course, if you hated tomatoes growing up, that’s probably not so surprising. But HARRIET loved them so much, I thought there MUST have been some magical transformative power in putting them between two slices of bread…”
#3 – Marzipan
Christine Taylor-Buttler – “Marzipan. Still traumatized from spending my allowance on beautiful candies that were not as delight consumed.”
#2 – Egg Cream
Chris Tebbetts: “Not terrible, just….more like a culinary paper tiger.”
Sarah S. Brannen: “They sound much better than chocolate milk with seltzer in it.”
Matt Bird: “I will back up everybody saying egg creams from Harriet the Spy. It sounds like an eggnog milkshake, which I loved, but available all year round, which would be amazing. Then I finally get to try one and it’s seltzer water with chocolate syrup?? No egg?? No cream?? How on earth did it get that name??”
#1- Turkish Delight
When I posted my question about misleading literary foods I took Turkish Delight out of the running since I knew that a lot of Americans would state their rage at discovering it wasn’t half as tasty as it looked. But people would not be denied proclaiming their betrayal. At the same time, TD defenders arrived en masse to take up arms and support the concoction. Here are some of my favorite comments on both sides of the aisle:
Peter Pearson: “I really wanted to like Turkish Delight. The first time I thought it tasted like gelatinous perfume, but then I thought, ‘Maybe I just got a bad batch?’ So I tried it again a few years later at a renowned confectioner. Same thing. After a decade of resampling and resampling, I finally admitted that C.S. Lewis and I will never agree on what it would take to sell out your family.”
Paula Willey: “I think there’s a big difference between the squishy jelly kind of Turkish Delight and the rolled nougat and nut type”
Cindy Olson – “I feel like I have to mention that I like Aspic (the Shrinking of Treehorn) as well as Turkish delight. I must be the rare person who enjoys weird jellied things.”
Rukhsana Khan – “I had Turkish delight in a shop outside Istanbul and it was to die for! SO many flavors!!! Each one amazing. Thing is it has to be fresh and it has to be authentic.”
Rachel Gorham – “Turkish Delight was absolutely what I was going to say as soon as I read the first sentence. I expected something between brownie bites and toffee. I tried it in my late 20s and it was absolutely 100% so disgusting. I’m still mad.”
Anastasia Higginbotham – “Oriental Grocery on Atlantic Ave in Brooklyn across the street from Sahadi’s has the Turkish Delight that seduces children into Narnia. Never tasted it ike that before. If you’re ever coming to NYC, let me know, I’ll try and get you some, freshly cut and sugar powdered – and soft! It blew me away to enjoy it there so much.”
Special Mentions
Other foods that got us down:
Suzanne Sutton – “Ambrosia. Clearly what I was served was NOT what the Olympians were chowing down on. *shudders in Southern dessert salad*”
Brian Lies – “Acorns. (In My Side of the Mountain). I gathered several pounds from a street in Cambridge, MA, shelled and lightly crushed them, then tried to leach the tannins out with a steady wash of water. They were wickedly astringent, and I can’t imagine the labor involved in prepping enough acorn flour to keep one’s self alive.”
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
Cynthia Richey: “I did the same thing when I was in 3rd grade—pounded them, rinsed with water, and then gathered my younger siblings and we all tried some, but we all spit it out! It was awful!”
Elizabeth Law: “Poi. I had this book called Ko of Menehune Land when I was a little girl (we lived in Hawaii). Ko could not WAIT for delicious Poi and a lot of the stories were about him trying to get it. When I finally tasted it as a teenager, when we were back in Hawaii, it tasted like kindergarten paste.”
Cynthia Richey: “Poi was mine, too! I’d read about it in a book in 3rd grade & when my class had some to try I wanted to cry because it was so bad! Tasted like library paste!”
Betsy Fraser – “Bread and butter – lots of that in Anne of Green Gables. Not improved at all by crabapple preserve. The grandmother I had that made jelly from crabapples also offered us ice cream – “Spumoni!” every time we visited when I was little. Ice cream with dried fruit was invented by the devil.
Filed under: Uncategorized
About Betsy Bird
Betsy Bird is currently the Collection Development Manager of the Evanston Public Library system and a former Materials Specialist for New York Public Library. She has served on Newbery, written for Horn Book, and has done other lovely little things that she'd love to tell you about but that she's sure you'd find more interesting to hear of in person. Her opinions are her own and do not reflect those of EPL, SLJ, or any of the other acronyms you might be able to name. Follow her on Twitter: @fuseeight.
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
SLJ Blog Network
The 2024 Bookish Charitable Giving Guide
Recent Graphic Novel Deals, October 2024 | News
The Seven Bills That Will Safeguard the Future of School Librarianship
Here, Have Some New December (And One for January) YA by Riley Jensen
ADVERTISEMENT
Rachel says
I don’t even like grilled cheese, but reading HEIDI always makes me crave one.
I lived on bread and jam until I went to college.
I now eat a much wider variety of food.
Orson Zedd says
GRilled Cheese is excellent, but so is everything on this list except chocolate babies, which I haven’t eaten but wouldn’t because British food is gross.
Judy Weymouth says
This post was really fun to read. I especially enjoyed the diversity of responses to a given food. Just goes to show how diverse our personal “tastes” can be and also how the preparation/presentation of a given food influences responses. My personal experience has been to find an EXCELLENT cook is capable of bringing out the best in many foods I thought I did not like.
Nora Hale says
This is hilarious. Thank you so much for making my day!
Margaret says
I can’t comment on poi, never having tasted it, but I have fond memories of eating school paste out of the giant jar during first grade. It tasted sweet. We used to sneak it when the teacher wasn’t looking.
Jenny Day says
Oh this has me rolling on the floor.
When I had Poi in Hawaii – I told the waitress it wasn’t so good. She said, “Well you have to add milk and sugar to it” Well, ANYTHING tastes good with milk and sugar added. 🙂
Sara says
Any Virginian worth their Duke’s Mayonnaise will fight you about tomato sandwiches. They are the ambrosia of summertime.
Joan says
ONLY if you’ve got decent home-grown or local tomatoes. When I was a kid, I tried making a tomato sandwich and all we had were those pink-ish, cottony-textured excuses for tomatoes they sell at the grocery store. Yuck! Not even Duke’s Mayo could have saved that sandwich!
Victoria Roberts says
What about the watercress sandwiches in Milly Molly Mandy? Watercress tastes terrible!
Betsy Bird says
Okay, so I had two different people mention watercress sandwiches, I kid you not. But neither of them gave me any worthy pull quotes so I wasn’t able to use it. But it should have shown up in the special mentions, you’re correct.
Carole Braden says
I’m an editor so please forgive me! I loved your story but I think the “books” in the second line was meant to be “foods” – right? I’ll wait to share the link. Such a clever idea and it brought back so many memories. Thank you.
Betsy Bird says
Your sharp-eyed editorial spotting to the rescue! Yes indeed, you are correct. And I, in turn, have corrected. Thank you!
Me says
Butterscotch Krumpets from Maniac Magee. Sounded wonderful but pretty meh.
Alison says
The original form of the Buterscotch Krimpet was much more delectable than the current one. I believe they used to deep fry the cakes and used a higher quality fat (probably lard) and sugar (not cornsyrup). They were so good I would lick the cellophane when I was finished.
Arona says
This is fun!! Our father always loved liverwurst…o never understood how,Meg could love the stuff.
Chocolate babies? What about broken crackers???
Janet says
My Dad loved it as well, we knew it by its German name, braunschweiger. He ate it on a sandwich with Heinz chili sauce. It’s kinda an acquired taste, I think.
Peter Pearson says
“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me eight times because you’re C.S. Lewis and how could something that’s literally named ‘delight’ possibly be bad, shame on you even harder.”
Glenda says
Thanks for your delightful post! I agree with Frances about those wiggly eggs, tho!
Betsy Bird says
Well, that would be a whole OTHER post. Foods Children’s Literature Characters Loathed That You Agree/Disagree With.
Susan Chapek says
I can’t believe that nobody mentioned the disappointment of running to the dictionary to learn what blanc mange is (Little Women).
(This post was the cream in my morning coffee today, by the way. Thank you!)
Janet says
On the other side, I did really enjoy ginger beer when I tried it. It was enjoyed in lots of the old British children’s stories, such as those by E. Nesbit.
Cheryl Blackford says
I LOVE the two Ms – marzipan and marmalade. Marzipan graced the top of my Christmas cake and I will be making marmalade as soon as the Seville oranges (bitter oranges) are ripe. Turkish delight on the other hand – you can keep that. Perfumed goo dusted with powdered sugar that made you cough – I could never see what Edmond saw in it.
Shawna says
Enjoyed this — my son is 28 now & once tried Turkish Delight. He was so disappointed! When I saw your title, I wondered if it would be on the list.
Lorena says
I’m sorry, who in the world could find HONEY disappointing? This blows my mind. I must assume they have only ever tried the grocery store kind that is half high-fructose corn syrup, but even still…
Personally, my biggest food disappointment was Cream Tea, and specifically Devonshire Cream. I had always pictured this as an unusually delicious, thick cream, and when I went to England and ordered my first Cream Tea, I confidently put the Devonshire Cream into my cup of tea. Which is when I discovered that it’s actually basically just slightly loose butter. Meant for the scones, not the tea. I did not enjoy the cup of Butter Tea I had to chug just to destroy the evidence of my cultural illiteracy.
Mary P McDonald says
Me! I’m not a fan of honey. It has a weird flavor. I do add a little bit to my cornbread though for sweetness and to add moisture. Yeah, and I have bought from local beekeepers and still didn’t like the flavor.
Bicycle Bill says
Not liking tomato sandwiches? GAAAH! That’s nothing more than a BLT minus the B, and we all know how good BLTs are, don’t we?
And a sliced liverwurst sandwich? Well, I’ve never had liverwurst (labeled as liverwurst, anyway), but a sliced braunschweiger sandwish – again, with a leaf or two of lettuce, slathered with mustard and Miracle Whip – is a comfort food from my childhood.
As for anyone who does not like chocolate in whatever shape or form, I will allow that IF and only if you are allergic to it (some people are, and I feel sorry for them). Otherwise, get away from me. You are not human.
Chole says
I have wanted to make maple syrup candy since I was seven! (Little House in the Big Woods, Laura Ingalls Wilder)
Mary P McDonald says
I tried making that when I was about 13 and babysitting my little sisters. We had fresh snow and I cooked the syrup for what seemed like forever, but it never got to the hard-crack stage. Probably because it was something like Hungry Jack syrup and not pure maple syrup. lol
Jfiction Jackie says
That photo is not of liverwurst- it looks more like bologna. Liverwurst is a spreadable pate and is DELICIOUS. I am going to respect everyone has different taste buds, but this post just made me hungry for honey, marmalade, liverwurst, tomatoes, and chickpeas!
Betsy Bird says
There have been some interesting discussions of liverwurst since I posted that picture. So that image comes from Katz’s Delicatessen in NYC. Apparently liverwurst overseas is very different from a lot of the American kinds. I’ve never learned so much about liverwurst in my life!
Melissa Jo Sites says
American commercial liverwurst is liable to be more palatable to the American palate than deli braunschweiger. I remember Oscar Meyer liverwurst from a plastic tube, served on Premium Saltines, to be one of the biggest treats of my childhood. Sliced deli braunschweiger is much toothier and harder for Americans to enjoy. Americans trying to enjoy liverwurst should think of it as a sibling of French pâté, and they will like it a lot better. A Wrinkle in Time and Cricket in Times Square are two of my top favorite books of all time, and I also love putting together literary picnics. Tucker Mouse and how proud he was of scoring that little hunk of liverwurst is one of my favorite culinary moments in literature — second only to Dorothy pulling complete box lunches off a tree in Ozma of Oz.
Erica says
The comment that said egg cream was just chocolate syrup and seltzer was doing it wrong. No eggs and no cream but there is milk in it. You can’t just use seltzer from a bottle, it has to be from a seltzer sprayer, so it’s not just chocolate milk with seltzer exactly, though those are the ingredients. (Personally I like vanilla egg creams though)
Janice Isaac says
Egg creams are the best, if done right. Everyone in NYC has known where to get them and many of us were taught to make them by our parents, in my case my dad. They’re wonderful. We did have to use bottled seltzer at home but if one got the milk and Fox’s U-Bet just right, it was okay.
Debra says
My husband and son tried molasses apples ala Berenstain Bears (just apple slices dipped in molasses). Turns out that bear food and human food — even if the bears seem really, really human — are not the same.
Mr. S says
All that stuff is delicious, so I’m going to go ahead and assume your respondents have fried their taste buds through heavy smoking or by eating a handful of Skittles every few seconds their entire lives.
Kim says
I’ll agree with the delicious part! Our family’s picnic sandwich is french bread, Mayo, a thin slice of liverwurst, cucumber slices, and dill. They are called Rachel’s after a family friend. They taste like a weekend adventure!
Robin says
When I was a student teacher, the class was reading Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe. For an assignment the regular teacher had the kids bring what they thought Turkish Delight would be. We had some really tasty treats that week! I think the Fudge Brownie Pie was my favorite. After that, real Turkish Delight was definitely a disappointment.
David LaRochelle says
What a fun post! And count me in the camp that thinks Turkish Delight is anything but delightful. I had always imagined it to be something like Bonomo’s Turkish Taffy. It was not.
Patricia Finn McManamy says
Don’t mess with Harriet M Welsch. I’ve been eating tomato sandwiches on her behalf since I was in 4th grade. Keep in mind, her author Louise Fitzhugh was from the south and presumably communicated the recipe to Cook. There is nothing like a tomato sandwich. And the egg creams–they were an adventure once one found out what they were and went to the Upper East Side to find out for real. But a very NYC experience with its own cultural roots and, once you give up the idea of an egg and some cream, it’s a homemade chocolate soda to sip from a long paper straw while you spy on the other customers at the drugstore.
Mary Beth says
I think about Harriet every time I eat a tomato sandwich!
Mark Hinshaw says
Roasted chestnuts.
Like Charlie Brown, Lucy, and the football, I get sucked in every Christmas.
THIS time it with be great.
…
Not once.
Melissa Jo Sites says
I hope you roasted them on an open fire?
Sure they’re burned on one side, but they’re pretty good I think.
At the time of the writing of the song, the American Chestnuts having been thoroughly wiped off the face of the planet was still a living memory, so I imagine chowing down on Chestnuts was big nostalgia.
Kristine says
The key to the tomato sandwiches and the bread and butter is the bread. We’re not talking about regular sliced sandwich bread, because a fresh loaf of hot bread with some salted butter is absolutely incredible.
and the tomatoes definitely have to be perfectly ripe. there’s a place nearby that makes a BLT with slightly candied bacon and it’s one of my favorite sandwiches ever.
lastly, turkish delight was so disappointing. We were in London a few years ago and I saw a vendor selling some in an open air market. I absolutely had to try it. To say it was disappointing would be a great understatement. I’m ok with the consistency and powdered sugar, but I can’t get behind the rose flavor.
Iris says
I’m from PEI, and the fact that raspberry cordial is on that list is a travesty. The thing that’s sold in a lot of stores that claims to be raspberry cordial is nothing more than a poor attempt at a sugary sour raspberry flavoured pop.
Jennifer says
Turkish delight is the same thing as Aplets and Cotlets. Armenians moved to the state of Washington and worked in the orchards there and needed a something to promote that regions products and they remembered “Locoum”. I love Aplets and Cotlets. The Aplets and Cotlets do NOT have rose water in them which may account for some types having perfume-y flavor.
Melissa Jo Sites says
First of all, I like the cubes of Rose and Lavender and Lemon, gumdrop style. But we went to Istanbul and ate Rahat Lokum, with nuts and nougat and lemon and chocolate…. it was endlessly delightful! Cool to know that the Armenians in Washington State make Lokum!
This year for Christmas I bought a box of imported lokum with pistachios and hazelnuts that was very good. It was still the gumdrop variety, but the flavors were reminiscent of Rahat Lokum — which has a whole song proclaiming it to be the best food in existence, from the musical “Kismet.”
Frank says
What about porridge? Goldilocks makes it sound so enticing. Spoiler alert: it’s essentially gruel.
Sue Ford says
This was so fun!
My favorite comment was: “C.S. Lewis and I will never agree on what it would take to sell out your family.”
Kristin says
The liverwurst and cream cheese sandwich can be delicious if you cream them together in equal parts to form a pàté.