ALA 2009: Book Cart Drill Team

Come at least half an hour early.  Do NOT sit directly in front of the action.  I mean, I guess you could if you wanted to, but I find that a side view is far preferable.  If you sit in the middle you cannot properly see the antics.  And you will want to see the antics.  The antics are imperative.  Note: Imperitive Antics would make a good title of a YA novel… for very weird children.

Mind you, this year one of the big jokes in a certain performance didn’t make any sense if you sat on the side.  So . . . there’s that.

The hosts, until someone else happens to come along to challenge their throne (memememe!), are usually Jon Scieszka and Mo Willems.  They offer the correct levels of oomph and panache.  They are also chuckleheads.  A useful thing in dual MCs.  Strangely they both manage to hold their own at the same time.  You would expect either one or the other to slip into the straight man role, but this has not yet occurred in my lifetime.

Anywho, sit on the side.  Sit in the front (you may have to arrive earlier than 30 minutes to do this).  If you’re lucky you will find yourself next to the very thin see-through curtain where you can see the performers in their sparkly wear, as well as the very loud easy-to-distinguish Jon Sciezka.

Then the show begins.  And you think to yourself, "How hard would it really be to do this next year?"  And then you begin to picture yourself in various scenes and scenarios.  You start rewritting the lyrics to Rihanna’s Shut Up and Drive so that it’s now Shut Up and Shelve.  You think about complicated book cart routines involving stacking, and dances along the lines of OK GO.  Substitute conveyor belts for book carts.  Genius!

It all pops like a brilliant bubble when you remember that (if you live in New York anyway) there is nowhere to practice.  And while a five borough team would be brilliant, are you really ready to break out choreography skills?  Skills that you are fairly certain you are lacking?